Paradox
by Itzus
Summary: Are you a person confused about your sexuality, unsure if your partner is really gay? Or are you just so desparately in love with someone that you'd stalk him or her? If you think that's BS (Big Salami) then take a look at this...
1. Default Chapter

Naraku and Kagome's discovery  
  
A/N Hello, hope you guys will like this story, its sort of original hehehe. Please be open-minded and mature about this story when reading and reviewing, this is a ROMANCE/HUMOR fic. So don't get your panty's in a knot. = P  
  
Disclaimer: Inu and Co. does not belong to you or me unless you're Rumiko Takahashi.  
  
*~*~*~*  
  
A light mist of rain clouded over Tokyo city. Naraku was out for one his afternoon strolls which also included stalking his beloved Kikyou. He waited outside her house and then behind the bush as Miroku came to her house and they walked hand in hand together to the bus stop, he followed.  
  
After sneakily tailing them for several streets, he caught a few words of what they were saying.  
  
"Today's special Kikyou, I've booked a room just for us in .," Miroku said putting his hands on her waist.  
  
"The .hotel, I can't wait to see you in." Miroku finished giving Kikyou a peck on the cheek.  
  
Naraku stopped in his tracks, the woman he loved was gonna sleep with that bastard? It could not be, not his Kikyou! Tears filled his eyes and he speculated that this was the best time to tell Kikyou how he really felt about her.  
  
He opened his mouth and yelled. "Kikyou, don't have sex with that guy! I still love you, and I have always loved you! Besides I have a bigger package!" He finished realizing that she and Miroku had walked away. While a crowd of old women passed by eyeing him hungrily. One old woman even pinched his ass. He jumped up and ran after his love.  
  
Meanwhile at the hotel of love.  
  
"Oh! Miroku yeah go lower!" shouted Kikyou.  
  
"How's that?" yelled Miroku.  
  
"Great, keep it up and could you put your arms a bit higher?" she mewed.  
  
"Sure babe, whatever you say." Miroku said shrugging, and began pumping faster. The image of a white haired someone popped into his head.  
  
Suddenly.he stopped.  
  
"What's wrong?" asked Kikyou.  
  
Miroku got off her and sat on the side of the bed. "This doesn't feel right somehow."  
  
"What do you mean is my body not good enough?" Kikyou said as she too sat up.  
  
"Well.I don't think we should be doing this." He said slowly.  
  
"Do you think we should have waited?" She said uncertainly.  
  
"That's not what I meant" He paused "I mean I'm in love with someone else.someone who's been there for me, and I just figured it out when we were doing it!" He said looking up into her eyes finding tears.  
  
She wiped it away and said, "Well we tried, and you weren't so bad, I'm sure you'll make this girl happy." She stood up and started to get dressed.  
  
When she was done dressing, she got her bag and walked to the door and asked, "So who is this lucky girl?"  
  
Miroku looked up once more, and thought for a moment, should he tell her? Finally, he said, "What if I told you it wasn't a girl?"  
  
Kikyou's mouth dropped open and she laughed.for the next five minutes. Recovering from her fit, she said "Um. I'm not really sure, but I think you would be gay!" gasping for breath.  
  
Miroku was silent.  
  
She rubbed her eyes, and stared at him, he was not laughing.  
  
"Don't tell me you're really." She gasped, shaking her index finger at him.  
  
"What?" questioned Miroku, "I don't think I heard you right."  
  
"I said, I think you would be GAY!" She shouted.  
  
Everything was quiet for a moment, even the couple in the next room stopped groaning and moaning.  
  
"Just cuz it's not to your satisfaction doesn't mean you should call me gay!" He said standing up with his dick drooping down.  
  
She looked at it and held in a giggle, "It's not that, but when we were doing it, you were like a girl."  
  
"Oh, I see." He was unhappy with the reason.  
  
"Well, we'll do this again sometime?" joked Kikyou as she left leaving the naked boy standing with many thoughts going through his head.  
  
"Sure." He replied in a sarcastic tone and started to get dressed himself.  
  
Standing there he thought, what if she's right! I can't be gay, can I?  
  
Outside Kikyou ran down the hall and out the door crying, she could not believe that she lost her virginity to a GAY person! She staggered down the street half blinded with tears. She returned home and since no one was around, (especially her annoying cousin Kagome); she took some Budweiser from the refrigerator and drank to forget her problems.  
  
Kagome raced down the streets toward the familiar two-storied Victorian house, which belonged to her childhood chums, Inu Yasha, and his half brother Sesshomaru. They had been with her ever since she moved to Tokyo. She hugged her coat tighter to her chest as the wind caused her skirt flapped against her knees. She rang the doorbell as soon as she got up to the front steps and a well-built young man answered the door.  
  
"Hi Kagome, come in!" said an excited Sesshomaru.  
  
"Okay, so did you do any research for the project yet?" she asked stepping into the hall as Sesshomaru took her coat.  
  
"Yes I did, and you'll be pleased to know that we will definitely get an A." he said not taking his eyes off her.  
  
Miroku stopped in front of the two-storied Victorian house and rang the doorbell. Ding Dong, Ding Dong, Ding Ding Dong Dong. Expecting to see Jaken answer the door he looked up, but instead saw Sesshomaru looking down at him with disinterest and an 'I have a date, go away' look.  
  
Instead, he said in a stony voice, "What do you want?" eyeing the young man peevishly.  
  
Miroku just stared at him; he never noticed how pretty he was.  
  
"Well.if you don't have any business here, then goodbye," Sesshomaru said coldly, preparing to slam the door in Miroku's face.  
  
"Wait, I do have to give Inu Yasha his homework." Miroku said holding the door with both hands.  
  
"Just give me the homework." Sesshomaru said grumpily.  
  
"No, I have to see him!" said Miroku desperately trying to squeeze himself inside.  
  
Sesshomaru raises an eyebrow at him, "Why do you want to see my brother that badly eh? Just give it to me!" He said grabbing him by the collar.  
  
"Ok" Miroku squeaked handing the papers to Sesshomaru and getting ready to leave then stopped.  
  
Peering into the house, he tried to think of another excuse to go in. A thought popped into his mind, "Oh, I also have chicken soup for Inu Yasha.and you can have his sandwich" He said suggestively with bright sparkly eyes.  
  
Kagome tired of waiting for Sesshomaru, looked out the window to see who had rang the doorbell, she was surprised to see Miroku. Had his date with Kikyou ended already? She wondered.  
  
Kagome had come down the stairs and was about say hello to him, but stopped when she heard Sesshomaru speak.  
  
"Look, I don't swing that way, but Inu Yasha does," he said seriously. "So would you like me to set you two guys on a date?" Sesshomaru asked.  
  
Kagome stood in shock, how could she not have known two of her oldest friends both liked boys and Miroku was dating her cousin too! She walked quietly away and out another door.  
  
Miroku began to blush and asked, "Hey, so can I come in or not?" handing the sandwich over to Sesshomaru's outstretched and trying to step in with soup in hand.  
  
"I'll take that, now leave and I'll be sure to give the soup and the homework to your boyfriend." he snickered yanking the container of soup away from Miroku.  
  
"Make sure he drinks it, and tell him that I made it myself just for him." Miroku shouted as he was pushed out the door.  
  
*slam*  
  
Sesshomaru tossed the lid off the soup bowl and drank it down in one gulp. Licking his lips he thought, that dude sure can cook.  
  
As Kagome walked along the street in daze thinking about Inu Yasha, it began to rain. It started with small drops but turned into heavy rainfall. Just as the rain had transformed so did Kagome, she began to cry, the droplets of water fell more and more. Not watching where she was going, she bumped into a hard body.  
  
She mumbled an apology but a hand grabbed her pulling her closer to the person. She looked up to see Naraku with an umbrella.  
  
"Kagome-san what are you doing here, you'll be soaked, you wouldn't want you to catch a cold now would you?" He said smiling sadly at her, in truth he had wanted to drown himself but figured that it wouldn't be dramatic enough for the newspapers.  
  
Kagome stared at him for a long time and then sobbed into his shirt.  
  
Naraku froze, holding the crying girl in his arms, when he himself hopelessly wanted to be held, but by another girl.  
  
After a few moments, they noticed they were getting an audience. Kagome abruptly pulled herself away from him and mumbled another apology for being rude.  
  
Naraku smiled, "I could've pulled away at first, but I think we both needed that hug."  
  
The two walked for some time and Naraku finally said, "So, you wanna go home yet?"  
  
Kagome nodded silently, and they began to talk about their annoying teachers. When Naraku suddenly asked, "So what was wrong with you at first?"  
  
"Hmm.oh, nothing, just some sand in my eye." She answered trying to change the subject.  
  
Naraku raised an eyebrow at her, "So you mean to say that you were bawling for five minutes just because there was sand in your pretty eyes?"  
  
Kagome blushed, "What, can't a girl cry over sand?"  
  
He laughed, looking at Kagome blush reminded him of Kikyou, and tears began to flow down his cheeks too.  
  
As Naraku hastily rubbed his eyes, Kagome could tell there was something bugging him as well.  
  
"Hey Naraku, is something wrong?" she started to ask.  
  
"Oh, look we're here!" he said ignoring the question.  
  
As Kagome was about to invite Naraku in, Kikyou stumbled down the stairs falling flat on her face, with Budweiser in hand, she got up and bawled, "Want some?" hiccupping.  
  
"Ohmigosh, what the f*** happened to you?" shouted Kagome goggling at her.  
  
Naraku turned red because Kikyou was in nothing but her silky, red panties and bra.  
  
Then he thought about what really could have happened to her. It must've been that bastard Miroku and his forcefulness, oh how his Kikyou must have suffered.  
  
Ashamed, Kagome asked Naraku to come another day when her cousin wasn't drunk and running around nearly naked.  
  
"I'm sorry, I don't know what's gotten into her today, come again tomorrow or something."  
  
"Kikyou started taking off her top when Kagome shoved Naraku out the door and apologized once more, her face flaming red.  
  
*~*~*~*~*  
  
Thanks for reading this far, now you can give nice reviews? The pairings might change so don't be pissed if Kagome ends up with Sesshomaru or if she doesn't, this is an example. So don't get your hopes up for anything. 


	2. Recollection

Disclaimer: Inu Yasha and Co does not belong to us, got it?  
  
A/N Sango and Shippou will of course show up later in the story in fact Shippou will probably show up in this chapter.  
  
~*~*~*~  
  
Leaving Off From: Kikyou started taking off her top when Kagome shoved Naraku out the door and apologized once more, her face flaming red.  
  
The Next Day  
  
"Augh, what the fricken heck happened last night?" groaned a not so sober Kikyou in the afternoon.  
  
As she fell off the kitchen table, she saw herself in the mirror and thought, 'What a slut!' She peeked inside her pajamas and found that she was nude underneath it.  
  
She crawled out into the living room exhausted and felt icky; she also had a weird taste in her mouth and she took a whiff of herself, "Ah, shit! I smell like Sesshomaru's old girlfriends!" she said a loud.  
  
She slithered up the stairs into her room hoping to catch a nap on her own bed but when she saw what her room looked like she gasped, it was so clean! The usual garbage found on her desk was gone, her trashcan was emptied, and her clothing was all gone. She also noticed that she could reach her bed easily without tripping over any bowling balls.  
  
Before she knew what happened she shouted, "Kagome what the hell did you do to my room!" Kikyou calmed down and collapsed onto her bed and only then did she remember, she had gotten drunk, but she still was not sure why. 'Oh well, time to get dressed?' she groggily thought as her alarm clock rang for school.  
  
Opening her closet/mirror, she blinked her eyes in disbelief. Where were her clothes? "Kagome you bitch Where the fuck did you hide my freaken clothes?!!!" She yelled at the top of her lungs. By now, the next door- neighbors were considering moving to somewhere far away!  
  
She spun around and stormed into her cousin's room that was just next door, she'd just have to borrow her clothes instead. As much as the thought sickened her, she didn't want to go out in her bunny pajamas, so she would have to suffer looking like a dork for one day.  
  
She flipped through the hanged clothes with a shrewd look and only when she expanded her search to the back of the closet had she finally found a short skirt that Kagome had about never wore, which was a birthday present from her and a light peach tank top that seemed sufficient. Honestly, her cousin had no taste.  
  
When all the dressing and zipping was done she looked around and maliciously thought, 'It's revenge time for cleaning up my room!' She began jumping on Kagome's neatly made mattress, and the pink fluffy pillow fell off the bed, what was beneath it was revealed.  
  
A picture of a six-year-old Kagome with a little silver haired boy was beside her and both were grinning happily. Kikyou suddenly realized who that boy was. It was that annoying brat down the street who was always calling her a whore. Inu Yasha, that loser! 'Well, I wonder why she has a picture of them together? And why would she hide it under her pillow?'  
  
She dropped the picture of the disgusting duo and wrung her cousins pillow in frustration only then did two more pictures fall out! She checked for more but only found stuffing and cotton. One of the pictures were of Sesshomaru posing with a smile, she had gotten one of those pictures, just like those twelve thousand other girls, but then she remembered that he only had one copy that he never showed nor gave any one and what d'ya know? Kagome had it.  
  
Eck, who would want a picture of that egotistical maniac anyway, she tossed it over her shoulders and looked at the other picture. There were a bunch of smiling faces and she was one of them, ah she remembered that day well.  
  
Flashback...psshhh  
  
"Hey, I thought you weren't gonna come?" said Kagome as she spotted her grouchy cousin.  
  
"Well, yea but I didn't want to stay home and let you guys have all the fun." She grumbled.  
  
Kagome had already walked away and joined her friends. They looked so geeky together and the person named Miroku was such a player. He must have hit on her like 45 times since she was nine.  
  
Kikyou moved away from the creepy crowd and inched towards the refreshment table to grab a bottle of Kid Aid.  
  
"Hey why don't you join us?" Inu Yasha asked staring after the cold beauty.  
  
Kikyou overheard and ignored his comment by sitting near Sesshomaru instead who was splayed out on a reclining chair half-naked. "Hey idiot, you're gonna get skin cancer if you don't put on some sun block," she said hoping he would fry for hours.  
  
He simply glared at her and said nothing, they sat in silence for quite a while until Kagome, and Miroku burst out from the bushes nearby.  
  
"Hey what were you guys doing behind those bushes?" Sesshomaru asked raising his eyebrows and glaring at Miroku.  
  
Kagome stammered and Miroku turned his stony gaze upwards and sighed, "Nothing."  
  
His dejected look caught Kikyou's gaze.  
  
Kagome still red, walked back to Inu Yasha and Sesshomaru followed behind. Miroku sat down in Sesshomaru's abandoned seat and had a faraway look in his eyes.  
  
Kikyou's curiosity got the better of her and she spoke up, "So...something did happen back there didn't it?"  
  
Miroku sighed, "So, you wanna go out sometime?"  
  
Kikyou blushed but recovered quickly, thoughts raced through her mind and after a moment of thought she said, "Yes."  
  
Miroku froze for a second, and turned to look at her in amazement.  
  
Kikyou blushed again amazed by her reply as well, "What?"  
  
"So what size are you?" He collected himself and smiled at her.  
  
*slap*  
  
*~*~*~*  
  
After that a strange yet enjoyable 'date', which was a ride to the park in his bike, a relationship formed and slowly Kikyou felt herself falling for the quirky boy more and more. Everything was just peachy keen until what happened at the hotel.  
  
"Miroku you idiot!" she shouted to the ceiling, that stupid, fruity, dumb jerk. He could die for all she cared, recalling the actions from yesterday.  
  
"You idiotic...moron..." She cried crumbling onto Kagome's bed, hmm; it doesn't smell as nice as I thought it would. ```````````````````````````````````````  
  
"Up, down, roll around, now it's time for squats you lazy maggots!" shouted Mr. Higurashi, whilst poking a student with his cane.  
  
"Inu Yasha, get your butt down, fore I slap your skinny ass!"  
  
"Fucking, old geezer... (Mumbles)...Why doesn't Miroku have to do as much work?" asked Inu Yasha.  
  
"Look at him, that innocent face, compared to you, such a nice young lad, now that's the kind of boy you all should be more like!"  
  
The other boys groaned, not that crap again. Miroku only beamed and said, "Yes, you should all be more like me."  
  
"All right girls lets give it all we've got, jump as high as you can to spike the volleyball! Oh, not you Kagome, you stay down...perverts like Inu Yasha will get strange ideas." said Higurashi.  
  
"Gee, grandpa you can't ask me to not participate...great...all the part- time jobs you could've chosen and you had to have picked this one?!" she pouted with her arms crossed.  
  
"Huh, if I didn't pick this job who knows what young boys would do, times changed Kagome..." he began to talk endlessly of the past.  
  
The young girl gave an exasperated sigh, "Fine, just stop talking, and you really shouldn't be so mean to Inu Yasha, he's not as bad as you think, once he even..." She suddenly caught herself.  
  
"Once he what?" Her grandpa asked with a raised eyebrow and a threatening look over at Inu Yasha.  
  
"Oh...look at the time I have to get to my next class," she said quickly and ran off.  
  
Mr. Higurashi turned around, fire in his eyes, and evil thoughts ablaze in his wizened head.  
  
"Inu Yasha!"  
  
"What?"  
  
"Extra squats for you for talking!"  
  
When he was down to the last squat, there was a sudden ripping sound and everyone turned to look at him. Before he could say shut up, everyone in the gym erupted into laughter.  
  
To top the worst for bad timing, his brother walked into the gym, "Hey, so that's where my ex-girlfriend's panties went. They don't look too good on you though." He said whilst handing a note to Mr. Higurashi who was wiping tears from his eyes.  
  
After school...  
  
"Hey Kagome, did you hear about what happened to Inu Yasha in gym class today?" said a grinning Sango.  
  
"No...why? Did grandpa give him extra laps or more detention?" she asked amused. "Heh...oh neither, he ripped his_"  
  
"Hey Sango, hi Kagome!" chirped a little voice. The boy gave his trademark grin with a dimple.  
  
"Oh hey Shippou," said Kagome merrily.  
  
"Did you guys hear about Inu Yasha's gym class accident?" said Shippou slyly.  
  
"Well, Kagome doesn't know yet, so would you care to do the honors?" Sango said rather happily.  
  
"Sure. So he was in gym when Higurashi gave him extra squats to do and well he tripped and his shirt came off...and then he somehow slipped out of his pants and he wasn't wearing any underwear!" giggled Shippou.  
  
"Hey wait-a-minute! I heard he's a cross-dresser!" said Sango. "Nuh uh, he was just naked!" argued Shippou.  
  
"Well, Kagome here's what I recollect from gym," interrupted Miroku, who had just suddenly joined the group.  
  
"Hey, that's right you were there, so tell us the truth," Kagome said half hoping that it didn't involve nudity and Inu Yasha wearing a dress.  
  
"Well, what really happened was he was trying to show off to girls again and for no reason at all, he then decided to moon me!" said Miroku blushing. "Oh, how I remember those pink elephants grinning at me..."  
  
Sango and Shippou laughed, but Kagome remained still, "Well, I guess since you saw *cough* it must be true, but I can't believe he would just show off like that!" Kagome finished with everyone's heads dropped to the ground. A swish of silver white hair told them who just arrived.  
  
"Ey guys, from the look on your faces, you must have all heard about the gym thing huh? No doubt a different story on each of ya!" said Inu Yasha with his arms crossed, slightly blushing, and turning towards Kagome.  
  
"You don't actually believe them do you?" He quipped.  
  
"Uh...fine, you tell me what happened then? Did you really moon Miroku? Did you strip naked, become a cross-dresser, or are you not wearing any underwear right now?!" Kagome accused.  
  
"Where did you hear that from? Sure Miroku was behind me, but it wasn't an all-out moon, and no! Only my shorts ripped, but I was wearing underwear! And I don't even know where the cross-dressing part came from." He said glaring at Sango who merely turned away.  
  
"Oh yes, you are a cross-dresser..." Shippou said pulling down Inu Yasha's pants in one quick motion.  
  
Time stood still once more, because whether Kagome really wanted answers or not, she got them as Inu Yasha's pink elephants grinned at its viewers.  
  
Inu Yasha who recovered first, he pulled his pants back up, wrapped his hands around the short kid's neck, and squeezed.  
  
"Why...you...brat...you're dead!"  
  
Miroku only continued to stare, Sango blushed, Kagome gasped open-mouthed, and Shippou struggled to breathe.  
  
"Help..." Squeaked Shippou.  
  
Kagome quickly got to her senses and ran to his aid; she pulled Shippou out of Inu Yasha's iron-like grip, and shot him a glare.  
  
"Come on Shippou let's get away from this mad elephant!" she said grabbing Shippou's hand.  
  
The two walked away leaving Inu Yasha gaping for words. Sango and Miroku stood still, awestruck from what just happened.  
  
*~*~*~*  
  
"Thanks for helping me back there, Kagome, I guess I deserved it though," Shippou said guiltily.  
  
"True. You did provoke him...but he still shouldn't have reacted so childishly," she said giving him a warm smile  
  
"Well, you can't blame him...being embarrassed like that, I mean pink elephants?" he began to laugh, but noticed Kagome seemed un-amused.  
  
Then, strangely, she laughed as well..., "but of course just don't do that to him again and he won't kill you."  
  
"I doubt it, he'll find other excuses to hunt me down..." he finished in a sad tone.  
  
For the first time Kagome noticed Shippou wasn't trying to joke around and she felt kind of sorry for the little guy. 'I'll just have to tell Inu Yasha to treat him better, but would he agree?'  
  
Just then, Sesshomaru appeared from nowhere, "Hey Kagome, hi pipsqueak."  
  
"Oh...Sesshomaru, I didn't see you coming, what're you doing here?" Kagome said turning to look at his smirking face.  
  
"Um...just coincidence Heh," he said face reddening. Before Shippou could question him, someone shouted, "Ah, Sesshomaru? Did you find those hookers yet?"  
  
"So...looking for hookers? Were you?" Shippou looked up hopefully.  
  
"No, Kagome, I assure you there's been a misunderstanding," he began to sweat and leaned over to Shippou whispering, "Yeah, you want in?"  
  
"Oh gosh, I can't believe what a day it's been! Well enjoy whatever you're gonna do, Shippou you can come over to my house and have dinner. Don't get yourself involved with any silver haired guys either," Kagome said quickly, grabbed Shippou's hand and left with Shippou who looked back at Sesshomaru like he'd been deprived a present.  
  
"Kagome, wait!"  
  
Sesshomaru wanted to chase after Kagome and explain, but then one of his girlfriends appeared tugging on his sleeve, "So, who was that? Are we still going to dinner or what? And, you can't have anymore girlfriends, cuz you have me!" she said pouting at him. He reassured her, "No, just you babe," flashing her his famous grin that made girls faint.  
  
~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~  
  
WELL, how about we call that a chapter folks? Review nicely as always...and any questions? 


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